Thursday, July 18, 2019
Football satire Essay
It is that time of year again; the NFL is kicking off another season. Millions of men are ready to get settled in their favorite chair and spend each Sunday afternoon in their underpants, watching hours upon hours of NFL games and highlights. It is also time for wives and girlfriends to meticulously plan and carry out sexual affairs, mostly with foreign men who have little or no interest in American football. Sally lives in downtown Pittsburgh and her husband is a huge fan of the Pittsburgh Steelers. Ã¢â¬Å"He watches every game, every highlight, and every report. He doesnÃ¢â¬â¢t miss anything, and that gives me time to have an affair with Simon, my British loverÃ¢â¬ , she told reporters. Like Sally, a growing number of American women now look forward to the NFL season, instead of dreading it as they have in the past. Ã¢â¬Å"I used to get so angry during football seasonÃ¢â¬ , said Sally, Ã¢â¬Å"but now, itÃ¢â¬â¢s a great time for both of us. He gets to watch all of the games, and I get to have an affairÃ¢â¬ . Last year, Sally suggested to several of her girlfriends that they too, have an affair during the NFL season. From this, a new subculture was born. Ã¢â¬Å"At first, I wasnÃ¢â¬â¢t sure if I shouldÃ¢â¬ , said SallyÃ¢â¬â¢s friend, Allison. A few weeks later, just after the pre-season, Allison found herself on a date with SimonÃ¢â¬â¢s friend, Ron. Days later, an affair began between the two. Ã¢â¬Å"ItÃ¢â¬â¢s niceÃ¢â¬ says Allison, Ã¢â¬Å"Ron doesnÃ¢â¬â¢t care about football, I have my affair, then season is over and I can get back to my relationship with my husband. Everybody wins this wayÃ¢â¬ . Marriage experts frown on what is being called Ã¢â¬Å"gridiron affairsÃ¢â¬ , but acknowledge that in some cases, it can keep a relationship or a marriage together. Ã¢â¬Å"Some men really do care way too much about the NFLÃ¢â¬ , says relationship specialist Dr. Parker. Ã¢â¬Å"Having the affairs may keep wives and girlfriends from getting angry and resentful, and therefore keep an otherwise healthy relationship together.Ã¢â¬ Parker stresses that there are better ways to deal with the NFL season, such as planning a night together each week when football is not televised. Sally and Allison, however, plan to continue their Ã¢â¬Å"football flingsÃ¢â¬ as long as their husbands insist on watching hours of football each week. Ã¢â¬Å"No way am I giving up SimonÃ¢â¬ , says Sally. Ã¢â¬Å"Not until my husband stops loving football, which isnÃ¢â¬â¢t likely to happen anytime soon Ã¢â¬Å".